Here I sit. Still comfortable and secure on the fence. Still noodling whether to write or not to write. Taking a 360 view of things opens one up to new and different perspectives. Nothing like noticing new things to make one more mindful and present. You know, like that lovely sincere pumpkin patch which I may otherwise not have noticed. Consequently, I was able to come to a decision about my dilemma. Very simply, I decided I did not need to decide. Nope. I can stop making a big deal out of something that is a little deal in the great scheme of things. The bottom line is if I feel like writing, I will. If I don’t I won’t. And there you have it. Just one more thing. A line in Robert Frost’s poem, Mending Wall, says, ”Good fences make good neighbors.” Good fences also make good thinking partners. So, if you find yourself in the morass of indecisiveness, grab your drink of choice, find a fence hop on and relish the view. Comments are welcomed.
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Tomorrow is the annual time when the spooks, ghosts and ghoulies emerge from the woodwork and various nooks and crannies looking to engage in mischief and shenanigans. I must say the times they have changed from the more innocent days of my childhood. One thing that hasn’t changed over the decades is Linus’ determination, perseverance belief and faith that the Great Pumpkin will Make an appearance in the sincerest of pumpkin patches. “With each year the Great Pumpkin rises out of the pumpkin patch he thinks is most sincere. He’s got to pick this one. He’s got to. I don’t see how a pumpkin patch can be more sincere than this one. You can look around and there’s not a sign of hypocrisy. Nothing but sincerity as far as the eye can see. Just wait and see, Charlie Brown. I’ll see the Great Pumpkin. I’ll see the Great Pumpkin. you wait, Charlie Brown. The Great Pumpkin will appear and I will be waiting for him.” Perhaps the Great Pumpkin will one day materialize. Then it will sprinkle the earth with magic pumpkin seeds and all the goodness in everyone will come forward to do good in the world. Not to mention how healthy we will become thanks to the anti-oxidants, iron, zinc, magnesium, protein, vitamin K and the many other nutrients found in pumpkin seeds. So let’s give it up for Linus, Charlie Brown and the pumpkins that provide fun, nutrition and deliciousness. Comments are welcomed. As I was sitting on that fence I wrote about last week, I looked around to see what might be on either side. I must say it was a beautiful, exhilarating October day. There on one side of the fence I spied a very inviting pumpkin patch. Of course, I had to jump down and check out the pumpkins and how sincere they were. You never know if the Great Pumpkin might make an early stop over as well. Not to totally abandon you, I have shared this delightful poem about October. October’s Party by George Cooper October gave a party; The leaves by hundreds came-- The Chestnuts, Oaks, and Maples, And leaves of every name. The Sunshine spread a carpet, And everything was grand, Miss Weather led the dancing, Professor Wind the band. Comments are welcomed. That is the question. This has popped up a number of times, more frequently recently. Whether ‘tis foolish to continue to sit on the fence of insufferable uncertainty, or to stand up against the morass of swirling indecisiveness and by making a decision, end it. The easy answer is just make the decision. This is not a matter of great consequence. Whatever the decision, it can always be reversed. So, what’s the problem, I ask myself? I’m making this a bigger deal than it is. If you stop to think about it, with every decision, there is uncertainty going into it. Yet, we still decide things. Sometimes with regret. Most times we do what seems best. Since decision is freedom and indecision is torture, I’m going week by week and write or not in accordance with the greener side of the fence. And there you have it. Today is Thanksgiving in Canada. I wish all of you who celebrate this day find much to be grateful for. What we need to rmember is gratitude is not for one day. It is for all seasons. Enjoy the turkey and all the fixin's.
As I was mulling over the conditions around the world and how much anti nearly everything has come to the surface, I had to take to heart Morgan Freeman’s sentiment about kindness. Even the smallest act of kindness can make a difference greater than we might ever know. It could work like the famous “butterfly effect.” Given this, I decided to reprint a previous blog on Small Kindnesses. Our choices can powerfully impact those around us. We get to choose how we want to show up when we walk into the coffee shop, take our seat on public transit, or call customer service. We have the option to acknowledge our shared humanity, and be present to one another. How do we want to show up? Who do we want to be? Wherever there is a human being, there is an opportunity for kindness. Research has shown that kindness can lower blood pressure, improve heart health, reduce stress and anxiety, even lessen pain. Who wouldn’t want some of that? Small Kindnesses By Danusha Laméris I’ve been thinking about the way, when you walk down a crowded aisle, people pull in their legs to let you by. Or how strangers still say “bless you” when someone sneezes, a leftover from the Bubonic plague. “Don’t die,” we are saying. And sometimes, when you spill lemons from your grocery bag, someone else will help you pick them up. Mostly, we don’t want to harm each other. We want to be handed our cup of coffee hot, and to say thank you to the person handing it. To smile at them and for them to smile back. For the waitress to call us honey when she sets down the bowl of clam chowder, and for the driver in the red pick-up truck to let us pass. We have so little of each other, now. So far from tribe and fire. Only these brief moments of exchange. What if they are the true dwelling of the holy, these fleeting temples we make together when we say, “Here, have my seat,” “Go ahead — you first,” “I like your hat.” Here is a lovely example of humanity and a kind heart: As the bus slowed down at a crowded bus stop, the Pakistani bus conductor leaned from the platform and called out, "Six only!" The bus stopped. He counted on six passengers, rang the bell, and then, as the bus moved off, called to those left behind: "So sorry, plenty of room in my heart — but the bus is full." He left behind a row of smiling faces. It's not always what we do, it's the way we do it. Comments are welcomed. Here are a few life lessons I’ve selected that came from the Ted Lasso show. There are many more, but these popped for me. I’ve also bottom lined them. Start where you are. Ditch any beliefs that you should already be an expert. Take stock of your own assets, such as your character strengths that will propel you. Own and share your emotions - The lesson is clear: When you experience emotional pain, acknowledge it. Allow yourself to feel it. Seek and accept support. Forget the outdated mandate to power through it alone—a sure prescription for burnout and psychic numbness. A more effective way to cope is to reach out to someone who cares, who will validate your pain and walk with you. What is the best version of yourself? What would the best version of you look like? As Atomic Habits author James Clear reminds us, "Every action you take is a vote for the type of person you wish to become." Who do you wish to become? What kind of actions will you take? Make quality connections. A reliable predictor of psychological health can be found in one's quality connections. Taking time to nurture your relationships does not represent dereliction of duty but expresses wise self-care. You'll experience more immediate pleasure and meaning while investing in future dividends. This is my favourite: Be a Goldfish. Part of Ted's hope strategy involves turning off the negative self-talk. "Be a goldfish." He claims they are the happiest creatures on earth because they have a ten-second memory. The next time your inner critic gets out its whip, call on your inner goldfish and move on. Comments are welcomed. Here’s the thing. Did you ever find yourself not in the mood to do something? You can either push past that unmotivated moment and do it anyway or, flow with the mood. That’s where I found myself as I sat down to write this week’s blog. There have been a number of times over the years when I went on a hunt for a muse to supply me with wonderful, fascinating blog topics. Not the case this time. There are options in my idea repository from which I could select. Sorry, but I am just not into it. I decided to buddy up with the mood and “go along not bothering.” All that being said, I will not leave you with nothing. Following is a little something, a little Autumn poem and a little Autumn Haiku. Starlight bowed then slowly faded from eventide's blue shadowed sky giving way to the gilded glow of autumn's harvest moon as she reigned over the world below - Michael Burch Gentle breezes blow Coloured hues of red and gold cloak the waiting earth. - Mary Serenc Raindrops on the roof. Golden leaves crunching underfoot. Snuggle with a book. - Ann Southall Comments welcomed. While kicking around some options for this week’s blog, I came across an alphabet game I wrote about at one time. I so enjoy all kinds of word games. I’ve made up several of my own. Some of which help me to fall asleep at night. My brain most likely gets bored and checks out. Thus, sleep. Many of the games I’ve made up involve the alphabet. Here is one that I like to think of as an alphabet for all seasons. Some letters have several words, which are primarily virtues. What words might you come up with? A: Appreciation, Awe B: Benevolence, Blessing C: Compassion, Consideration, Connection, Caring D: Decency, Dedication, E: Enthusiasm, Enjoyment, Effort F: Friendship, Forgiveness, Fairness G: Generosity, Goodness, Gratitude, Good Will, Grace H: Hope, Honesty, Humility, Happiness, Honor I: Inspiration, Imagination, Insight J: Joy, Judiciousness K: Kindness, Kindness, Kindness L: Love, Light-heartedness, Levity M: Merriment, Mindfulness, Mirth N: Nurturance, Novelty, O: Optimism, Objectivity P: Peacefulness, Positivity, Playfulness, Presence Q: Quietude, Quality R: Respect, Resilience, Reasonableness S: Sincerity, Smiles, Simplicity, Selflessness, Service T: Thankfulness, Tolerance, Thoughtfulness, Trustworthiness U: Understanding, Upstanding V: Value, Virtue W: Well being, Wonder, Wisdom X: Xenodochy which means hospitality and fellowship, Y: Young at heart, Z: Zesty, Zen as in peaceful, calm Comments are welcomed There’s a restaurant a friend and I lunched at before the pandemic. I haven’t had an opportunity to return since. Recently we reconnected and made arrangements to go back this week. This restaurant has a very fine baked goods section. I would always purchase some cookies to bring home. So, the past few days I’ve been dreaming about cookies, lots of cookies. The plan is to leave that restaurant with a generous supply of my favorites. I will put them in the freezer and have one now and then for a special treat. That said, following are some fun quotes about cookies. Today we will live in the moment, unless it is unpleasant. Then we will have a cookie. A balanced diet is one cookie in each hand. You can’t be a smart cookie if you have a crumbly attitude. Cookie is the answer. Who cares what the question is. Save the earth. It’s the only planet with cookies. When you are down and feeling worse, keep a cookie in your purse. Sorry, Santa, too late. Grandmas never run out of hugs and cookies. Cookies are like duct tape. They fix everything. Cookies are happy, because that is their job. Making those you know, and don’t know happy. They tell people you care. I don’t know about my inner child, but my inner cookie monster wants to come out and play. In case you were concerned, broken cookies don’t have calories. Comments are welcomed. The researcher behind the practice of self-compassion is Kristin Neff of the University of Texas, Austin. Here are just a few of the benefits that her research has demonstrated: -Decrease in anxiety and depression -Increase in emotional and physical well-being -Greater sense of self-worth and optimism. And, in case you’re worried that self-compassion will leave you happily eating chips in front of the TV all day while your bills go unpaid, Dr. Neff’s research also makes it clear that self-compassion actually enhances our lives in practical ways as well, including: -Greater personal responsibility -Decrease in procrastination -Greater progress toward goals. So developing a practice of self-compassion can be extremely helpful in our efforts to create lasting positive change in our lives. Let’s look at how we can start to develop that practice. The first thing to do is to think briefly about an area in your life where you tend to be self-critical. What does the self-critical voice in your head tend to say to you? And if you heard a friend or loved one saying things like that to herself, what would you say in response? Or what would a wise and caring friend say to you if she could hear the self-critical voice in your head? Thinking about this can help you to craft self-compassionate responses that you can offer to yourself when your self-criticism starts to kick in. Kristen Neff describes the friend whose kind voice we’re trying to call up as being both wise and caring. Our self-compassionate statements are meant to comfort us and encourage us—not simply to let us off the hook, but to affirm our worth in a way that can lead us back to what we most want for ourselves. One of my favorite Neff quotes during a difficult time is: “This is a moment of suffering. Suffering is part of life. May I be kind to myself in this moment. May I give myself the compassion I need.” Comments are welcomed. The Canadian National Exhibition (CNE) opened it’s gates this past weekend. It’s one of the big events reminding us that summer is going to be moving on. One of the CNE’s trademarks is it’s food menu. This year’s menu seems to have outdone itself. Following are a few of the stomach-turning options. Cheeseburger Ice Cream - ice cream is served in a cheese-coated waffle cone, topped with a pretzel and pickle while the Street Corn ice cream features a lime, cotija cheese and chili seasoning. Holy Moly Cannoli - This jumbo cinnamon cannoli is stuffed with veal cutlet, breaded and rolled in provolone cheese. It is then topped with provolone and Pomodoro, garlic aioli, rainbow sprinkles and topped off with hickory sticks. Don’t forget the sprinkles. Malibu Pink Mac & Cheese - made with a pink champagne sauce along with three cheeses -- aged cheddar, gruyere, and parmesan. And, to make things a little more extra, it comes in a bread bowl along with an optional dollop of caviar. Krispy Kreme blueberry chicken sandwich - features the signature crispy chicken breast sandwiched between two classic Krispy Kreme glazed donuts and slathered in sweet and spicy whipped blueberry cream cheese. The watermelon burger! This combination features a juicy burger patty with feta, mint and spinach sandwiched between two watermelon slices. It’s then doused with balsamic glaze. The piece de resistance: The four-pound taco. - composed of a hard-shell taco with cheese, lettuce, tomatoes, sour cream, pico de gallo, avocado, tomatillo salsa, pineapple, chorizo and french fries. You can top it all of with some Pickle Cotton Candy. If you dare to indulge, be sure to have plenty of Pepto Bismol and Alka Seltzer in your backpack along with your cardiologist and gastroenterologist on speed dial. Bon appetite! Comments Welcomed.
We are in the middle moving toward the end. There’s still so much to enjoy the next couple of weeks – fairs galore, harvesting of the new crops, shopping trips for new school and work duds, still time for vacations, a super blue moon on the 30th and more. After coming across a couple of short poems that made me smile, I decided to stick with August one more time. Here they are. Buttercup nodded and said good-bye, Clover and daisy went off together, But the fragrant water lilies lie Yet moored in the golden August weather. - Celia Thaxter (1835–1894 All the long August afternoon, The little drowsy stream Whispers a melancholy tune, As if it dreamed of June And whispered in its dream. The thistles show beyond the brook Dust on their down and bloom, And out of many a weed-grown nook The aster-flowers look. – William Dean Howells The months have rolled around once again to August. There’s something about this particular flip of the calendar that has an oddly positive affect on me. I say odd because I don’t feel quite the same for other months regardless of what they offer. I have not figured it out yet. Perhaps it doesn’t need to be figured out, just enjoyed. Most of what makes August is still the same. The one thing that is not the same and concerns me is the weather. Once it became August there was a shift. A slightly cooler crisp quality that would start to replace the hotter humid air. Not this year or even in the very recent past. Climate change is hitting full on. There are record temperatures all around the earth, not to mention increased wild fires, floods and other natural disasters. This ought to be a major wake up call. Especially to those who can actually do something significant about it. Of course, each one of us can do whatever small things we can. It can make a difference. The more of us that do our part the difference will be bigger. What shocks me is that there are still those who don’t believe in climate change. To what else would they attribute the current condition? Anyway, I don’t want this to get depressing. There’s still much from which we can find fun and happiness. And, in case you may have forgotten or didn’t know tomorrow (August 8) is Sneak Zucchini Onto Your Neighbor’s Porch Day. Comments are welcomed. As I was thinking about the current state of everything, Robert Fulghum’s book All I Really Need To Know I Learned In Kindergarten came to mind. The lessons he sited are inter-generational. They still hold value today. I revisited those lessons and thought I’d share some of them with you. Share everything. Play fair. Don’t hit people. Put things back where you found them. Clean up your own mess. Don’t take things that aren’t yours. Say you’re sorry when you hurt somebody. Wash your hands before you eat. Flush. Warm cookies and cold milk are good for you. Live a balanced life—learn some and think some and draw and paint and sing and dance and play and work every day some. Take a nap every afternoon. When you go out into the world, watch out for traffic, hold hands, and stick together. Wonder. Remember the little seed in the Styrofoam cup: The roots go down and the plant goes up and nobody really knows how or why, but we are all like that. Goldfish and hamsters and white mice and even the little seed in the Styrofoam cup—they all die. So do we. And then remember the Dick-and-Jane books and the first word you learned—the biggest word of all—LOOK. Everything you need to know is in there somewhere. The Golden Rule and love and basic sanitation. Ecology and politics and equality and sane living. Take any one of those items and extrapolate it into sophisticated adult terms and apply it to your family life or your work or your government or your world and it holds true and clear and firm. Think what a better world it would be if we all—the whole world—had cookies and milk about three o’clock every afternoon and then lay down with our blankies for a nap. Or if all governments had as a basic policy to always put things back where they found them and to clean up their own mess. And it is still true, no matter how old you are—when you go out into the world, it is best to hold hands and stick together.” Comments are welcomed. |
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