Greetings and Salutations. Samuel here. The time has come for me to return to the North Pole with my final checklist on the Jones children. Without revealing any details, I believe Santa will be pleased. I so enjoy my assignment to the Jones household. Having this same assignment for a few years, I feel like part of the family myself… at least every December. It is most interesting observing the children go through their ups and downs, naughty and nice moments. It’s always good to see the nice win out. I would like to see that be the case for all children. Our business, after all, is about spreading goodness, joy and loving kindness throughout the world. Until next year, I wish all of your hearts be filled with peace, joy and good will. As the big man says, “Happy Christmas to all and to all a good night.” Back to our weekly blogs starting the New Year. Comments are welcomed.
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Greetings and Salutations. Samuel here. Based on all of the escapades I’ve been relating, it must sound like the North Pole is in a constant state of mayhem. However, considering the hundreds of years we’ve existed, these incidents are really few and far between. In truth, North Pole Enterprises is expertly and efficiently run. Seriously, how else could Christmas Eve occur so flawlessly every year? Following is an account of one more of those episodes which made headlines in the Fairy Tattler. At the core of the North Pole operation is Magic Sparkle Dust. For example, it’s the Magic Sparkle Dust that allows Santa to fit through any size chimney. It enables the sleigh and the reindeer to fly. It makes things possible beyond your imagination. More than what I’ve told you is top secret and must never be revealed. Hundreds of years ago our elf chemists, Maurice and Estelle, were working in the lab. The Magic Sparkle Dust was an unexpected result of one of their experiments. It revolutionized and made the entire North Pole what it is today. The Magic Sparkle Dust lab became highly secured and inaccessible to all except Maurice, Estelle and, of course, Santa. The day of the disaster the lab alarm went off while Maurice and Estelle were in the middle of making a batch of Magic Sparkle Dust. They were so startled they dropped what they were doing. They ran helter-skelter trying to find what triggered the alarm. The unwatched M.S.D. began to bubble and fizz and formed a mist that filled the air. It seeped out of the lab. A strange haze soon enveloped the North Pole. Everyone became frozen like statues. Maurice and Estelle wore face masks while working in the lab and still had them on when they ran out. Thus, they were not affected by the mist. Finding nothing sinister that could have set off the alarm, they returned to the lab. It didn’t take them long to realize what had happened. Fortunately, being well-prepared for any potential emergency, they had an antidote for the mist and its affects. Since that time, the Magic Sparkle Dust lab has been extremely well-guarded and impenetrable. Although we have our suspicions, it remains unknown as to who or what activated the alarm. That is all I can say about that. By now, you must be thinking how much secrecy surrounds everything connected to the North Pole. That is the way it must be so the whimsy, mirth and merriment of Christmas can be properly and eternally enjoyed. Until the next episode, which will be the last for this year, I bid you dreams of dancing sugarplums. Next episode Christmas Eve. Comments are welcomed. Greetings and Salutations. Samuel here. The day began like all others in the cookie kitchen. The baker elves were busy making the usual number of batches which keep the cookie coffers full. Lester, the CEO (Chief Elf Officer), was wandering through, hoping for some samples. The bakers said he must wait like all the other elves until the cookies were ready. Because Lester is the CEO, he is permitted to carry a small amount of Magic Sparkle Dust. I will tell you all about the Magic Sparkle Dust in the next episode. Lester recently needed to use that Magic Sparkle Dust. He happened to have a single wee speck stuck to one of his hands. As he passed by a batch of cookie dough, the speck came loose and landed in the dough. This may not seem significant, but even the tiniest particle of Magic Sparkle Dust can have a ginormous effect. Two things happened as a result of the MSD particle. First, the more cookies the bakers made, the more the dough kept growing. Secondly, as the cookies came out of the oven, they flew into the air. They circled around the kitchen and then flew outside. The cookies were flying everywhere. The elves noticed this strange phenomenon, left their jobs and ran out to catch the cookies. They caught and ate cookies until their tummies were sick. They got too sick to work. Consequently, toy production got way behind. Would the toys be ready for Christmas? Santa usually punishes naughty elves by taking away cookie privileges for a period of time. In this case, he felt all those sick tummies were punishment enough. When they were well enough to return to work Santa had them work double shifts in order to meet the toy quotas. Eventually, that cookie dough stopped growing. The elves actually did not eat cookies on their breaks for a long time. Imagine that! Next post Thursday. Comments are welcomed. Greetings and Salutations. Samuel here. The North Pole is a very big operation. It takes a lot of departments to see that Christmas Eve happens flawlessly. Everyone knows the resident elves are the driving force behind toy production, taking care of the reindeer, keeping the sleigh in mint condition and updating Santa on all the goings on at the N.P. Yet, there are other agencies that keep Santa informed on very important matters. For example, Santa gets his daily local news feed from the Fairy Tattler. One of the largest and most essential agencies is the CIA (Christmas Information Agency) to which I’ve been appointed. There are a number of Not So Secret Agent Elves who are primarily responsible for providing Santa with the Naughty and Nice lists. These elves are assigned to families everywhere to monitor the children’s behavior. Another group of agents include The Stringer Elves. The Stringers travel the world to locate and report back about families who may be having difficulties at Christmas. A list gets compiled and the Christmas fairies and Christmas angels are called upon to help. The fairies and angels then do their best to lighten the hearts of those in need. Do you know how to tell if you received angel magic? All you have to do is listen to your heart. If you suddenly feel like you want to do something nice for someone or want to make someone feel good, then an angel might have whispered a message to your heart. Now I must get back to my duties in the Jones household. Don’t forget to deck your halls. Next posting Monday. Comments are welcomed. Greetings and Salutations. Samuel here. Phoebe and Freddie are another pair of mischief makers. Is it starting to sound like there are a lot of upstart elves at the North Pole? Not really. The 6 I have mentioned are the only scalawags among the multitude of elves. Any community will have a small population of scamps. That’s just the way societies are. The truth is that the rest of Santa’s elves are very happy and work together in harmony. Back to Phoebe and Freddie, who are assigned to the wooden toy department. They do make beautiful wooden toys. Lester, the CEO (Chief Elf Officer), often compliments them for their fine workmanship. You’d think that would please them. Not so. In fact, they got the idea that the Toy Center would function much better if they were in charge. They hatched a devious plan. When all of the elves went on their cookie break, Phoebe and Freddie stayed behind waiting for Lester to make his rounds. They lured Lester into the supply room pretending to need help locating some materials. Once he was well into the room, they ran out locking Lester inside. You can guess what they were going to do next. Elf Cleo is a designer in the wooden toy department. She left something she needed at her station. Returning to get it, she saw what Phoebe and Freddie were doing. Cleo went right to Santa to report their tomfoolery. As a result, Phoebe and Freddie were detailed to separate shifts and, of course, no cookies for the rest of the month. Tales of the North Pole are not only about elf shenanigans. Next time I will tell you about the CIA (Christmas Information Agency) which is my department. Til then, Fa la la la la. Watch for the next posting Thursday... Comments are welcomed. Greetings and Salutations. Samuel here. As advertised, I’ll now tell you about the reindeer. Thanks to J. Edgar Snooperfairy and his relentless snooping, this story appeared in the Fairy Tattler. You are all familiar with the 8 reindeer that fly through the night taking Santa on his rounds. Rudolph and that odd colored nose of his is there, too. You may think those reindeer just roam around grazing on lichen and moss, minding their own business until it is time for take-off. They may appear oblivious, but they are keenly aware of everything that happens at the N.P. That is how they got into trouble with some persuasion from elves, Willie and Marcella. Willie and Marcella are a wee bit dodgy and you are never quite sure what they will try to stir up. Indeed, they were the instigators of the near cookie calamity. During grazing time, the reindeer talk amongst themselves. One day they were bantering about the elves and their cookie obsession. They did wonder what the cookie fuss was all about. After all, lichen was a most satisfying super food. “Cookies? Really?” they snorted. Willie and Marcella happened by the reindeer and overheard the chatter. They looked at one another, smirking as they had the same idea. They sidled up to Comet and Cupid who were the most suggestible of the herd and convinced them they ought to try some cookies. As you likely know, sweets can have a seriously ill effect on animals. Fortunately, Bernard came by to check in with the reindeer and saw what was going down. He stopped the reindeer from eating the cookies just in time. Willie and Marcella found themselves in Santa’s office once again, being repeat offenders. Santa, who is so kind-hearted, gave them one more chance to shape up or they would be shipped out to the elf rehab facility. Meanwhile, Bernard explained to the reindeer, Comet and Cupid in particular, the dangers of eating foods foreign to their species. In the end, all was well again. Next episode will be posted on Monday. Comments welcomed. Greetings and salutations. My name is Samuel. I am Santa’s Not So Secret Agent Elf, Reporter of all things Naughty and Nice. I was assigned to the Jones Family a few years ago to observe the children and bring back the checklist of the children’s Naughtiness and Niceness. Just so you don’t get the wrong idea, I always root for the Nice List to have the most checkmarks. It usually does in the Jones household. I decided to write because there are some very interesting goings on at the North Pole. They usually involve some of the elves going a little rogue. For instance, one year Harry and Larry, the twin elves, decided to play a trick on Bernard who is in charge of the reindeer. When Bernard was on his lunch hour, Harry and Larry rounded up all the reindeer and locked them in a warehouse next to the toy workshop. When Santa found out, he was so disappointed. Harry and Larry were not allowed cookies for an entire month. This was serious punishment as all of us elves are crazy for cookies. One more thing you might like to know before I return to my duties. The FBI (Fairy Bureau of Informers) assigned J. Edgar Snooperfairy to the North Pole to report on the mischief and shenanigans. His stories appear in the Fairy Tattler the daily tabloid that keeps us up to date on all things Christmas. Now I must return to the Jones family. Comments Welcomed. |
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