The Nearly Never-Ending Story Part 1

“The difference between fiction and reality?  Fiction has to make sense.” – Tom Clancy  
 
This sorry tale began some time ago.  After 14 years of enjoyable lying down on and sitting on my sofa and love seat, it seemed time for a new set.  The decision to actually go for it was a difficult one.  After all, we had been through a lot together – my sofa, love seat and me.  There were the days of watching the Blue Jays win the 1993 World Series; our first Christmas with them in the apartment; entertaining friends; finding evidence that the cat preferred the sofa to his scratching post; cuddling with my first grandchild.  The list goes on.  Being in our second apartment for nine years, it was definitely time for some changes.  My reluctance to actually go shopping was two-fold.  First, the sofa and love seat were still in remarkably good condition for their age and adventures.  Secondly, I purchased the set, brand new, for a whopping $600.  Where could I find a good sofa and love seat in today’s market for anything remotely close to that price for even one of the pieces?  Not.  
 
After many months of agonizing, I finally decided the time was nigh.  Here’s the thing.  It is not possible to purchase a sofa set independent of everything else in the room.  This means that suddenly you are thinking about repainting the walls, new drapes, flooring, the other furniture in the room.   Visions of dollar signs started running helter-skelter in my head.  I heard a drawer open.  My bank book leapt onto my desk and started screaming at me.   
 
I told my bank book to be quiet and get back in the drawer.  I hadn’t spent anything yet.   
 
Being properly prepared for making a big, long-lasting purchase is the best way to minimize shopping induced migraines.  Off I went with measurements of the current sofas, height and width of doorways and a sample of my carpet which was not being replaced.  Unfortunately, I was limited by the size of the doorway that would be used for delivery.  The doorway was best suited for Hobbits.  After a couple of unsuccessful furniture forays, I phoned a designer friend.  She had a business arrangement with Sklar-Peplar.  C (my designer friend) and I took a drive out to the showroom.  I had a good feeling about this trip.  The first sofa I sat on I knew was the one.  We measured it. It measured up.  I still tried every piece of furniture in the entire showroom to be sure.  Returning to the first sofa, I said I would go with that one and its matching love seat.  Selecting the materials for the sofa and throw pillows turned out to be a simple process.  I really like the color and material of the floor model.  One of the complementary fabrics for the throw pillows would pull all the colors of sofa, carpet, walls together.  I even got to choose whether the legs for the furniture be a natural wood or a dark coffee bean.  Natural wood, please.  The transaction of purchase was completed and I was to get my new sofa and love seat in about 8 weeks.  That allowed time to get the living room repainted and select new drapery material.  That part also went smoothly.  
 
One day I was sitting in the living room envisioning the new sofas with the freshly painted walls and new drapery.  Something did not feel right.  My old wall unit, an old end table and a falling apart desk no longer seemed to fit.  A few years prior I had purchased a solid oak, Mission style coffee table.  I had been dreaming of also replacing the aforementioned pieces with more oak Mission style units.  Why not go for the whole enchilada?  I never had brand new solid wood furniture of my choosing before.  This would be that once in a lifetime opportunity.  Off I went to Early Canadian Furniture.  I found exactly what I had hoped for.  The wall unit and desk would be custom made.  They would be ready just about the same time as the sofa set.  I even decided to ignore my bank book which was having a nervous breakdown in its drawer.  I’m not a very impulsive person, but again, this was a once in a lifetime event.  
 
Everything was moving along so well.  Too well, I suppose, for the forces of evil.     
 
I received a phone call on a Monday, notifying me that the wall unit and desk would be delivered on Thursday.  Then I received a phone call notifying me the sofa set would be delivered on Friday.  Living in the disorder of not having all my stuff where it belonged was starting to wear on me.  Thursday came as did the wall unit, but not the desk.  It wasn’t ready and would be another month. This was the first in a series of aggravations.  The next day the sofa set was delivered.  OMG!  They brought the wrong set.  The delivery guys said to keep it until it gets straightened out and they were gone in a flash. 
 
The throw pillows were correct.  Go figure.  

Please return next week for the rest of the story.  You will not believe what actually happened.

​Comments are welcomed.

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