Every year at this time I start thinking there’s something about August. Especially late August. The air is cooler . At least it used to be. The sun sets a little earlier. Gardens are being harvested. Summer vacations are drawing to a close. Kids are returning home from camps. Fair season has begun. Back to school is lurking around the corner. There is also a sudden feeling that the first small step into autumn was taken.
Over the years I have relished the good feeling that has gone along with this particular snippet in time. This year seems to be different and I am not liking the difference. First, let me say that I have always been a big fan of Autumn. Autumn and Spring are 1 and 1a for my favorite seasons. As much as I thrive on the cooler weather, something is not feeling quite right. In fact, I am aware of a low level of anxiety or dread about the inevitable winter. After pondering the situation, I think I have come up with why. It’s kind of a P.T.S.D. scenario.
About mid-January of this year there was a monster snow storm. I recall being quite disturbed by additional limitations to the ones I already had. I became less independent than I already was. The discomfort didn’t get a chance to ease much as another unfortunate episode happened in March. I had a form of vertigo that affected my well-being into June. What I realized is that I’ve been feeling the retention of the memory of those difficult months. That memory had me dreading a repeat this coming winter.
As I acknowledged that anxiety about something that, in actuality, may never happen, my attitude began to shift. I also believed that some COVID crazy exacerbated my worries. So many of us have experienced unusual effects from the pandemic.
Seeing thoughts and unfounded expectations through a lens of truth and reality, allows me to once again look forward to what I love about Autumn.
There are 2 morals to this story:
One: We should not believe everything we think.
Two: Stressing over impossible to predict tomorrows, robs today of it’s joy and wonder.
Comments are welcome.